Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Random Babbling

I have been searching for patterns lately and now they are everywhere, staring me in the face. I observe stories and how they play out in various forms. It's a bad habit, I suppose, but one that is necessary to the kinds of projects I do. But lately I feel a bit like a mouse in a maze that's being led to the cheese.

It seems that every time I watch television or watch a movie, it's all so cookie-cutter that I have many of the key events figured out before it's 1/3 over. We are spoonfed information. Why did that guy who is a doctor move in next door? Probably to help diagnose the disease that is about to rip through a suburban neighborhood. How funny that the little girl is obsessed with water and has dozens of half-full glasses of water around the house. It's quite convenient when the aliens that invade cannot tolerate the beverage.

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I don't look people in the eye. It's a family trait, I've noticed. I thought it was a bad habit but it turns out, when I've tried to do it, the experience is simply too intense. Why is that? Is it the habit of not doing it that creates the feeling that it's too intimate? Is it something inborn--perhaps genetic or cultural--that makes this difficult? I've learned, too, to use hand and face gestures in an exaggerated way to avoid this uncomfortable situation. This makes me think it's about the wiring in my brain rather than the custom of my family.

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